Toy Story 3 - 2010 - Dir. Unkrich

I had the bar set pretty high for this. In fact, it was set so high... I didn't even go see it. In fact, in some ways, I actively avoided seeing it. I knew... deep in my cowboy heart... that I expected it to make me cry, to crush my spirit, and to make me long for a childhood imagined by the previous two movies. So you know... I was sorta setting myself up for a let down. But I wasn't really. The movie was good. I enjoyed watching it... sure, it didn't destroy my emotions. At best, I got a little misty eyed... Maybe I shed a single tear? I can't remember. I'm writing this a month later. Point being, it's like every other Pixar movie I've seen. It's real great. It's got a nice, well told story. Some laughs. Some thrills (oh man! That ending was pretty dang thrilling!) And there's even a Totoro! How can you beat that!? The answer is YOU CAN'T!!! Also, lemme just say... that goofy little girl in the rain boots was adorable and any child I have who isn't like that will be an inherent disappointment. The best thing about this movie is that it doesn't feel like a cash in on the series. It wraps everything up in a nice way and has a nice mix of what's comfortable and what is fresh. It never really competed with my FAV's but hell... a nice solid entry.

QUIT PLAYIN' WITH THOSE TOYS! YOU BIG DUMB KID! YOU DUMB BABY-KID!!!

The Secret World of Arriety - 2010 - DIr. Yonebayashi

I liked this a lot! I wasn't sure if I was. I'm a Studio Ghibli fan, although to be honest I'm mostly just familiar with Miyazaki's work. But, you know, I figured it would be pretty good being Studio Ghibli but it totally surpassed my expectations. You know... it's not as blobby as some fine ass Miyazakis but Blobs ain't everything. The finer details of the Borrowers' world make the picture pretty damn engaging pretty damn quickly. The Sound work in the house is just the absolute best. You can HEAR the bigness. Like, you know, I felt like I was exploring a whole new goddamn world. So I was charmed is what I'm saying. The movie charmed my damn pants off. Most of the voice acting is real good in the English dub. Will Arnett's casting is especially amusing. And Carol Burnett KILLS as the goofy villain. Although she's hardly a villain, I suppose... Or she's not MUCH of a villain. Sometimes I would struggle with the boy... but I think the nature of his dialogue was more of a hindrance than the acting. Those kinds of lines never seem to translate very well into English and they're certainly not easy to pull off. The movie has a nice emotional core to it, if sometimes a little stilted. It made for a really enjoyable evening and I would definitely get down with it.

OH FUCKING SHIT SOME CRAZY BITCH RIPPED MY ROOF OFF!!!!

My Neighbor Totoro - 1988 - Dir. Miyazaki

I'm not gonna sit here and act like I don't think Totoro isn't charming as shit. I'm not going to do that to you people. I mean, seriously. We're talking Totoros. It's charm goes a long way because it has a pretty simple bare bones story. With almost no conflict whatsoever. I think it we were watching your usual children's fare... or really just a normal movie. You know, you would put up roadblocks for our characters. "Adults don't believe them" or "Some Lumber magnate is threatening the forest" you know, crap like that. But we're in exploratory mode with this movie. Just watching kids discover mystical creatures of the forest. Then a kid is lost for a short period of time, but it's certainly nothing we're hinging the movie on. It's merely the highest point. I suppose the closest thing to the conflict throughout is the sick mother... at least, it's the source of drama for the script and what eventually leads the little sister to get lost. But that is about the long and the short of it as far as drama is concerned. Miyazaki can get away with this of course because of the aforementioned charm and the damn visuals that we've all mostly familiar with. You know like a giant cat bus and whathaveyou. Just so we're clear: if you have a giant cat bus, your movie can be whatever it wants to be.

OMG LITTLE GIRL IT IS A TOTOROS!!111

Ponyo - 2008 - Dir. Miyazaki

I loved this movie! And I was pretty suspicious of it to begin with... well, I was suspicious of the dub. They usually piss me off a bit and I try and not make that the first version I watch. But it wasn't that bad... to be honest, I am struggling to think of any particular detraction dub-wise but it was excellent. The translation is really strong too. I suppose something like this would be easier than something like Spirited Away or Mononoke considering it was much less focused on Japanese mythology and lore. It more based in fairy tales, especially Andersen's Little Mermaid. So I guess there is something a bit more universal. But what I think was it's greatest strength was just how much fun it was. Ponyo could have been especially annoying, you know, excited little girls jabbering on about Ham endlessly. That could get old pretty fast. But I found her pretty damn charming. Sosuke worked out really well too. IN FACT, I never thought I would say it but the children felt like the best actors in the film. I'm not sure how well Tina Fey's comic tone translated to the dub and for some reason Liam Neeson sounded particularly stilted. Maybe he just couldn't really put himself in the shoes of a sea wizard who was in no way mentoring a young warrior.

I hate it when Little Me tries to get out of the Me-hole.

Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole - 2010 - Dir. Snyder

I was pretty hesitant to actually take the time to see this movie... I mean... I like owls and all... but Zack Snyder... FOR KIDS? I'm not even sure if I get down with Snyder for the "mature" audience. I'll admit that he probably made the movie way more pleasant to watch than most other directors. I mean, it looks cool. I think there's a kind of banal quality about the sweeping landscapes that makes them somewhat forgettable and unremarkable. As I watched it, I was like... hey... that's great. But I couldn't tell you much about what I saw afterward. Probably on a movie screen with 3D glasses, I'm sure this would have blown me away though. But I watched it on my laptop, instead. The script is an absolute mess though. I know it's based off of a fifteen book series or something but C'MON, but some fucking effort into it. As far as I could tell, they didn't even stick that closely to the books, so I feel like there's no excuse for all that meandering story-telling and herky-jerky pace. And again, I like owls, BUT THERE WERE TOO MANY OF THE FUCKING MOTHERFUCKERS. I feel lucky that so many were inconsequential and pointless, so I didn't feel like I had to keep track. I dunno... I'm not sure if this is a great kids movie and I'm just an asshole. Probably a nice distraction for a kid. I bet i would have been a bit more of a sucker for this if I saw it in 3d... but as I've stated numerous times, I eat that shit up like Buffalo Wings.

Well maybe you shouldn't be flying in a storm you fucking owl!!

Secret of Kells - 2009 - Dir. Moore/Twomey

I have a funny issue with this movie. First of all, it IS beautiful. It was definite multiple viewing potential just based on the visuals. I think my issue comes from the storytelling. It draws heavily from Irish myth (which I'm fairly uniformed of) and certainly does have a mythic feel. In fact, it feels like a myth first and a film second. It's very strangely paced. Not entirely emotionally stirring. In some ways it's kind of neat and fun that the film doesn't try and hit any of the beats that a normal film might try and hit. It gives the impression that the film is from a different time. At the same time, it's very instructive as to why we have those beats to begin with. The visuals carry the slack that comes from the story telling, though. My particularly favorite part involves Brendan's battle against Crom Cruach. It reminded me of Samurai Jack repeatedly with the line work. The film clocks in at about seventy-five minutes which is perfect for this kind of movie. I have to say though, it ends pretty anti-climatically. Maybe there's just a culture gap, but I couldn't get pumped for the ending... even though the visuals made me want to get into it. Which I suppose is the feeling I had throughout. My eyes wanted to get pumped but my brains just didn't get on board.

Screw you, Culture Mob! I wanna steal your pictures!

Princess Mononoke - 1997 - Dir. Miyazaki

It'd been a while since I saw this last. It was the first of a new wave of Miyazaki to flood our shores, purchased by Miramax and getting all Billy Bob Thorton-ed up. I was surprised by how mature the movie can be at times. In fact, it's depiction of the pull and pull of mankind between nature is particularly done well, lacking any definitive victor, it leaves us to see that this is an ongoing process. It doesn't exactly feel emotionally uplifting when you want the antagonist to be punished, but I suppose that's where the maturity comes in. We can always beat up the bad guys. The "bad guys" aren't even that. There are clear evil acts but rarely are there outright evil characters (although Jigo is a real prick). Often times, Nature acts just as badly Man. But none of them act as badly as the American dub cast (A HA!). Especially Billy Bob Thornton. Probably, I would say that Billy Crudup and Minnie Driver are the bright spots which is thankful due to the size of their roles but despite the "star-studdedness" of the main cast it sounds mostly like a lot of phoning it in. I especially struggle with Anderson and the Wolf although I can't tell if it's her acting or just her voice clashing with the strange movements of wolf's mouth. But whenever she spoke I was immediately distracted. It's a modern classic of anime, with strong storytelling, and even paced well considering its length. It's accessible enough for anyone who isn't well versed in anime and can still please the well-initiated. And what anime would be complete without a giant blob creature?! NONE.

Ordinary life in Muromachi Japan

Evangelion: 1.0 You Are (Not) Alone - 2007 - Dir. Anno

I try and not be too skeptical of remakes and reboots and the like. It must be pretty natural for people to want to take awesome things or things that could have been awesome and make them AWESOMER or, I dunno, relevant or something. I kind of grew up on Evangelion and it'd been kind of a while since I'd seen it, so I was having ALL KINDS OF EMOTIONS while watching this reboot/whatever of NGE. Like Evangelion-type emotions, with screaming and hurling myself around and clutching limbs. I know in the later films, all kind of shizz is gonna change, but for the most part I kind of felt like this movie stuck with the original series pretty closely. A lot of settings changed, some 3d popped up (sometimes feeling very awkward and sometimes being absolutely stunning), the story feels like it's been appropriately streamlined. Sort of like Anno had about a decade to rethink how to best tell the story. Probably what felt the most reworked were the angel fights. And they look SWEET. There are some explosions where you look at it and you're like: "HELL. That thing blew up." Really, it feels like anything involving the Eva was what got the most work (which is kind of funny because that's probably what I remember the least). If there was something that felt like an unwanted change, I would say it might have been the music. Maybe I just really wanted to hear some classic tunes, or maybe it was the Choir with lyrics that were... well... distractingly dramatic. I feel like a Choir is sort of the Ace in the sleeve you toss out at the most exciting part... I don't really want it to pop up three or four times.

Did you know Michael Jackson had a song called You Are Not Alone? I didn't.

Black Jack: The Movie - 1996 - Dir. Dezaki

I don't know a ton about Black Jack. I had no idea that the little girl sidekick was actually some kind of awful living tumor/parasitic twin. I mean, that wasn't a plot point or anything. In fact, I basically got along pretty well as far as understanding WTF was going on in this movie. That's the point I was making. ANYWAY, it was pretty entertaining, I suppose. Although, to be honest, I'm having difficulty recalling a ton about the movie and it's only been a handful of days since I saw it. I feel like I must have blacked out during the climax or something because I don't even remember what it is exactly. Prolly the most memorable thing are the medical/sickness sequences. Which I suppose is the focus of the anime anyway. There's a ton of people spewing blood. And HOT SURGERY ACTION. It follows Black Jack as he tries to help the Brain Company figure out why it's superhuman Olympians are going nuts. The "going nuts" sequences are pretty neat and the plot/story line is interesting and approachable enough. Naturally, there's all kinds of corporate dickery going on. At one point, Black Jack gets the Olympian disease and performs Olympic surgery. I mean, this is a movie about a rogue surgeon, so I'm not applying realism here at any point. There's a lot of Manga-esqe transitions and editing tricks. Some work really well and some end up being corny. I'd say it's half-and-half. At the end of the day, I'm glad they were there. So, I dunno, clearly it ends up being rather forgettable with some neat "hospital scenes."

Be careful, I'm a rogue surgeon.

Akira - 1988 - Dir. Otomo

FUCKING AKIRA! 5 STARS!

Mary Poppins - 1964 - Dir. Stevenson

As a big tough guy, I never bothered to watch Mary Poppins or if I had, it was as a kid and never seemed to bother to remember it. I have to admit, it's quite charming. I was originally won over by a remix made from sound clips from the movie and MAN, did I get a kick out of the dancing. And Dick Van Dyke's charming idiot smile. That's nothing to saw of Julie Andrews who is charming all in her own right. Of course, these things are known and have been known for years. I'm just getting on the train. It did not disappoint, dancing wise. Seeing Dyke semi-flail around balanced by Andrews unfaltering grace and coolness makes for a great chemistry. Which is important considering the film is pretty light story wise. Something that is actually pretty interesting to watch. It's a Disney before it became a well-oiled machine. It's a little more daring at times. What comes to mind is it's light-hearted treatment of the Banker's death. Not the most lovable of characters, but they do crack a joke on his expense and shrug off his death. It's actually kind of neat. It's a nice feeling movie, always a little playful. Perhaps not a masterfully told story like some of Disney's features, but a masterfully charming film.

Everyone is happy about what is above them except the little girl, who is all about something to the right of her.

Fantastic Mr. Fox - 2009 - Dir. Anderson

I've been excited for Fantastic Mr. Fox all the way since when Wes Anderson was first connected with the project. I suppose maybe I was a little disappointed, I think a lot of doubt was raised by the trailer. The movie won be over however. With a terrific amount of charm and some fine directing. When I get right down to it, I liked what I saw. But I think as I headed into the third act, I realized "This is it." I couldn't help but crave a little bit more. Maybe since the film dodges between Adult and Children mode a little bit. The Child had fun but the film kept taunting the Adult me with Wes Anderson-isms, keeping him watching but never fully satisfying him. There's not a ton as far as character development goes. I can help but feel that Mr. Fox both learns and neglects his main lesson. I think perhaps the scenario with the Wolf sums up the movie very much. Well-crafted, beautiful... but it feels perhaps shallow. I won't deny that I believe that film requires a second viewing on my behalf. It would be a pleasure. For my eyes and my childlike self got a kick out of the movie. The movement of the characters is incredible and flows so well and Anderson isn't shy about showing off either. There's plenty of sneaking and dancing sequences, all of 'em kicking ass. As well as some great stand-off sequences and some spaghetti western nods, I can't help but recommend it.

OH NO! Someone killed Giant Bill Murray!

Persepolis - 2007 - Dir. Satrapi/Parronnaud

Persepolis looked neat. But we all knew that already. In fact, I think it might be one of the most honest trailers I've come across. I feel like everything the trailer offers you, you get. That isn't to say it's a bad thing. In fact, I rather enjoyed Persepolis. I can't admit to being emotionally stirred by it. I have a very medium feeling towards the film in general. Perhaps, I'm just too uninformed of Iran's modern history to grasp the more subtle aspects of the film. I thought I knew a decent chunk. *SHRUGS!* It's very good about letting the audience know what's going on. There's a terribly amusing bit with Iran's History with Great Britain. There's nothing terrible about the movie. It moves along as it should. It doesn't pull too many tricks. I cared, through and through, although I dunno how much I connected. Satrapi as a little girl is the CUTEST fucking thing though. I mean, it's a really great story. Clearly, the film is fine. DANDY, even. I suppose I can't really get over my mediumness feeling. It does awesome work with silhouette and shades of gray. It's a perfectly acceptable thing to watch if you're in the mood to watch a long version of the trailer.

This girl is just the cutest.

Lupin III: The Castle of Cagliostro - 1979 - Dir. Miyazaki

It had been a while since I got all with the Lupin III business, so I was a little bit rusty. Not that there is really a lot to remember in the Lupin series. I'm just saying, It had been a while. I had completely forgotten about Goemon. Whose pretty awesome. Apparently, this is the most well-known of the Lupin films, perhaps because Miyazaki (who worked on the series) got his grubby little fingers in it. His mark is definitely left on the film, whether it's the beautiful castle scenery or the fact that everything wiggles a little bit more than you would expect (Lottawigglin). The story is paced a little slowly, I remember being shocked about half way through that I was only halfway through the movie. Lupin is definitely a little bit more of a gentleman than I remembered him being. He takes on the role of Knightly Thief pretty early on in the film and doesn't drop it. He's still a ton of fun and all what with his general wackiness. There's even the inevitable team up of Zenigata and Lupin as they head off against a big douchebaggery committing count. The voice acting is okay. Honestly, I don't expect too much from the series as far as voice acting is concerned. It's a pretty silly show, so the stilted acting meshes probably a lot better than a decent bunch of actors. They seem to know this too. It's not like they're accidentally crappy or anything. There's a ton of fun sequences with ninja's with bladed arms and fingers that are kick ass to watch. I mean, its what you would basically expect from a Lupin movie... except with a touch of early Miyazaki hanging around.

Lupin III driving around his money around.

Coraline - 2009 - Dir. Selick

I was kind of disappointed in Coraline. I dunno. I'm not really sure what I was expecting. Well, I suppose since the reviews were so positive. And it sure did LOOK neat. But the movie felt fairly hollow to me. Visually, it's pretty stunning, I wish I had been able to see it in 3-D, I imagine it might have made a bit of a difference, as it did with Up, although I really never felt that the film was selling me a hallow experience as Coraline did. I dunno, it's sort of funny to say but the film doesn't feel like it has much of a soul. It simply moves us from one stunning visual set piece to another, skipping of the "Why's" of the story. There's no real origin of the Bedlam, the antagonist of the story. She just seems to exist and that's about it. Coraline doesn't seem to really learn very much. She seems to appreciate her parents a little bit more. The story wraps itself up neatly, seeming to suggest that if Coraline's family didn't have money issues, the movie would have never happened. I dunno, I felt that I kept asking more from the backstory, I wanted to have an idea of who these people were. Coraline is spunky, her parents are busy. Are they ALWAYS busy? Is Coraline being bratty because she isn't being paid attention to? Because she moved? Is she always this way? Past the visuals, I couldn't really find anything to latch onto in the film. I wanted to care. I wanted some story telling. The third act fetch quest is intensely rushed and hectic functioning mostly on visual themes that were set up previously. See, that's the thing, the film does set up a really REALLY palpable sense of dread and menace throughout though. Maybe another reason why I was so let down. It actually does a really good job of creating atmosphere. We see hints of the nightmare from the start of the film. I was getting really nervous and excited for what might be going on. What the movie was going to TURN INTO. But when the nightmare reveals itself, it seems impotent, that the bark was actually worse than the bite. And since the nightmare world is so easily dispelled, it immediately becomes WAY less threatening. I mean, the opening sequence of the doll making is vulgar or violent in a way, as if we're watching the destruction and reformation of a person. I was immediately pulled into it. Coraline had everything on its side when it started out, totally dropping the ball for me, but left behind some fairly impressive visuals.

Even Coraline is pissed at Dakota Fanning!