You know, I don't watch a lot of Seagal movies. I can't for sure know why that is. I probably should, but I think I have a tendency to hang onto JCVD's broken English more than Seagal's squinty mutterings. So I may not be have the right to say this but I think The Glimmer Man might be the perfect Seagal movie. Well, maybe not PERFECT, but at the very least it's a well-oiled one. All the parts are in the right place and functioning correctly. And as a bonus we get a scene with Stephen Tobolowsky and Brian Cox as a stupid villain whom you get to see swim around in a pool. You have the Ivory Wayans and Seagal mixed up partner relationship, achieving everything required of it like Wayans eating powdered deer penis and Seagal... uh... I don't know, smiling on bemusedly as he proves Wayans wrong at every turn. Seagal's faux-sprituality is fairly present, which isn't so much a character trait as much as something that can spur on banter since Seagal's beliefs and wisdom generally bends to whatever he feels like doing in each particular scene. "Eh, the guys makin' fun of my prayer beads! Lemme mutter something then kick him in the head." But I suppose the movie is entertaining enough, It's exactly what you should get when you watch a cruddy action movie from the mid-90s. In a sense, it should be in a museum... for 90's movies.
I'm white and you're black but somehow we still get along!